My Spiritual Journey
By: larry.ellis@softwright.com
(The following information is a brief attempt to tell you about my spiritual
journey. Its reporting is incomplete and I am one who remains in process, but I hope
that if anything that I share brings encouragement to the readers, you will take
the time to let me know. I would greatly appreciate it.)
Personal History
I was born in Duncan, Oklahoma in 1947 and lived there until I graduated from
high school in 1965. I graduated from the University of Oklahoma in 1970. Jill
Senning and I were married in 1979. We have two grown, married children.
I had wonderful Christian parents who taught me what it meant to be a Christian
and establish and nurture a personal relationship with God. I became a Christian
at the age of five when to the full extent of my understanding I invited Jesus
Christ into my heart. I faithfully attended Sunday School, worship and youth
group activities throughout my years at home. At the age of five I had begun to
pick out some of my Sunday School songs on the piano at home. My mother started
me in private piano study at that age. I continued piano and organ private
lessons for twelve years there until I left for college. I earned a Bachelor of
Science Degree with a major in Electrical Engineering from the University of
Oklahoma, Norman in 1970. While there I was active in the Baptist Student Union,
especially in the area of music. I was a Southern Baptist until I moved to
Colorado and joined Corona Presbyterian Church in Denver, Colorado, in 1970. I was a active
leader in Corona Church for sixteen years, serving as an elder for nine of the
last 12 years there. I organized and conducted the Baroque Choral Ensemble for
many of those years. I left there to become the worship leader, director of
music, and organist of Meadow Hills Church, Aurora CO. I served in that capacity
for five years, during which I was ordained to the Gospel Ministry in 1988. I also
served as the organist, choirmaster and director of music ministries at St.
Gabriel the Archangel Episcopal Church in Denver for over six years. I have
enjoyed the privilege of serving minister of worship and music in several churches in
various denominations as my spiritual journey has led me. Having arrived in the
Anglican fold via the Baptist and Presbyterian paths has been a wonderful and
strengthening process.
My Interests and Personality
I am an entrepreneur. I owned and operated my own telecommunications
consulting engineering business and was the CEO of a telecommunications
engineering software company for over thirty years. I have a vast
knowledge of the telecommunications and broadcasting industries. As a Registered
Professional Engineer, I have designed many radio and television stations
throughout the country. I constructed, owned and
for
several years
operated a
commercial FM radio station. I have significant experience in many areas of
electronic media. This includes advertising sales, public relations, news,
programming production, web design and management and Internet marketing. I have
produced several video teaching tapes on both engineering and management
subjects. I have directed a number of talk and variety television shows, which
aired on cable television. I enjoy working with and managing people. I am
particularly good at group dynamics and discerning and building consensus when
that is appropriate. I can also take a very directive and assertive role when
that is called for. My Meyers-Briggs personality type is tested to be ESTJ. My
life experience confirms this as an accurate model applied to me, although I
believe that we should relate to each others as individuals rather than as some
particular personality profile.
I designed and constructed a pipe organ for our home. I also constructed a
concert Zuckerman French-double harpsichord. In addition to playing both of the
above, I enjoy playing my great-grandfather's
Wheelock upright grand piano from the late 1800s. I have produced two Christian
record albums. I have a commercial pilot’s license and greatly enjoy scuba
diving. I am fluent in Spanish. For many years I was active in the Denver Chapter
of the American Guild of Organists.
Because I believe that there is always more to learn about ministry in the
kingdom of God, I have read countless books on theology and styles of worship
and the ministry of music throughout my adult life. I have also taken a number
of graduate courses in this arena. I have conducted choral clinics and
attended a number of organ and composition master classes throughout the
country and composed over ninety sacred choral works and congregational hymns. I have been to England numerous times and in December of 1997 I went
there for 10 days, five of which were spent at Kings College Cambridge,
worshiping and contemplating the greatness of God through the uniqueness of
Cambridge. In both 2002 I spent two weeks in London composing music at the
personal organ of Charles Wesley, now at the Wesley Chapel, City Road, London.
In 2003 it was my privilege to spend time in Bristol at the "New Room" where
John Wesley had his training times for new preachers and at the home where
Charles Wesley lived for a number of years and composed many of his hymns. Each
trip there draws me closer to my Christian roots than I have ever felt even
after returning to my geographic and familial origins here in the USA. Although
this is mystical for me, it is the nearest personal encounters with God that I
can identify within my lifetime. Although I reject the rigid expression of a narrow
fundamentalism theology from which I came, I also retain the essence of a very
personal Christian faith that I believe was central of some of the great early
Christians such as the ancient and contemporary martyrs, Luther, and Wesley.
This also stands in contrast to many progressive innovative expressions of
Christianity where Jesus' unique sacrifice for all of us is reimaged to mean
something very different from what he taught and where the words of Scripture
are redefined from generation to generation and culture to culture. I believe that God desires that each of us
grow into the unique persons that he created us to be. This is contrasted
against many who embrace that we are called to replicate some narrow
authoritative collective expression of a small segment of the Christian
community. My experience has confirmed that the Episcopal Church is a very
healthy environment which can embrace the uniqueness of each individual.
My Early History thru College
I was fortunate enough to have Christian parents and grandparents who taught me
to love God very early in life. We attended every church service that our church
had on Sunday mornings, Sunday evenings, and Wednesday evenings. I faithfully
attended church camp every summer and was active in all our youth group
activities, while at the same time serving as the President of my high school
science club. I read my bible daily and tried very hard to bring my life into
conformity to what I saw that God expected of me. I have wonderful memories of
my mom teaching me to recite the Lord's Prayer and John 3:16 even before
attending the first grade. I began playing my Sunday School songs on the piano
by the age of five and my parents saw that I began formal piano lessons at that
age. I practiced a very sincere faith all through my high school years. Early on,
I was encouraged to play special music on the Hammond organ at the Central
Baptist Church in Itasca, Texas, where my grandparents lived. I also was the
church pianist for many of my middle and high school years for a small Southern
Baptist church in Duncan, Oklahoma.
In 1965 I left home and started college at the University of Oklahoma, Norman,
majoring in Electrical Engineering. I was excited to move into a new level of
cultural and spiritual growth in a new venue. Naturally, I continued in my
Southern Baptist tradition. There I met new Christians and formed deep personal
friendships with those who embrace many of the same spiritual values, which I
had accepted as central to my life. During my college years, I began to learn to
think critically and began to more deeply discover my spiritual bedrock. I
continued a very conservative and essentially a fundamentalist style of
faithfully applying the spiritual litmus tests on both me as well as others.
Certainly there were those who were Christians outside our great Southern
Baptist operations, but they could all learn quite a bit from us, because no one
had quite the level of fidelity of Christian expression as we did. I knew very
few persons of who were not both Caucasian or Southern Baptist. I had never
questioned any issues of authority in the family and church, the Charismatic
movement, role of women, Americanization of our faith, or any worship expression
more removed from my current environment than a large college Methodist church which was
considered slightly suspect by some of my long-term friends
I was a member of First Baptist Church in Norman, Oklahoma, during the last years that Dr.
E. F. Hallock was the pastor. His teaching was truly a major positive influence
on my beginning of a deepening spiritual experience. Preacher Hallock
intentionally became a Christian as an adult when God moved in his heart,
following his graduation from Union Seminary in New York. He then understood the
difference between being a god-fearer and one who has a regular personal
encounter and subsequent relationship with God. My freshman college Sunday
School teacher, Al McCord, was also a very strong spiritual encouragement to me.
Al was a geologist who loved his family, his work. and also made spending time
with college neophytes a high priority. Decades later, I still remember all those
stake dinners at his home with his family, his personal spiritual encouragement
and his active participation in doing the work of serving those so much less
fortunate than we. I was loved and influenced by campus pastors and inquisitive
fellow students. I was taught that we are all called to evangelize others into
our Christian faith. Living a model life of piety was expected, and I
dutifully delivered it to the best of my ability. Internally, I eventually found that something seemed to be missing in
my Christian experience, but I had no idea what that something might be. During
my junior year Preacher Hallock retired and I began visiting some other
churches. The most obvious thing to me was differences in music and worship
styles. I was quite strongly drawn to the less folksy churches that were less
personality orchestrated than my Baptist experiences. I liked being a
bit more formal, not announcing hymn and the opening of worship services with a
procession. Corporate worship that was more majestic seemed more appropriate to
me. Having intellectually stimulating bible teaching presented in a little less
dogmatic style was also very attractive to me. During my last year in college I
joined the chancel choir of McFarlin Methodist Church in Norman. The friendships there,
along with the excellent leadership by Dr. John Yarrington as the minister of
music, was a major highlight of my college Christian experiences. Some of my
friends really could not imagine why I would not choose to attend a Southern
Baptist church, but that did not deter me from this germinal transition stage.
Post College Processing
Upon graduation in 1970 I accepted an engineering job in Denver, Colorado, and soon
thereafter found my Christian home at the nearby Corona Presbyterian Church. For
the next 16 years I enjoyed great friendships there. I labored there learning
and teaching what I learned in virtually all areas of the Christian life. I
discovered the good things from the Institute of Basic Youth Conflicts (such as
reconciliation in relationships) along with a great number of teachings which I
now strongly reject, especially in the area of dogmatic uniformity and
authority. In that arena I would include theology that teaches that
the husband is the "boss" of the wife and much of what Bill Gothard taught about
music. I flourished at the heart of the emerging discipling ministry that was
popularized during the late 70s and early 80s. Unfortunately, I had come to
understand this to mean reproducing in others what God is doing in my life, and
in turn enabling others to pass it on to a third and fourth generation. I loved
the large collective church experiences. I helped organize church-wide retreats,
long-term singles ministries that centered on small group development and
regular directive bible teaching, carefully interpreted and applied so that all
the followers would line up as I believed they should in our patriarchal
operation. From time to time, I went through a number of spiritually dry
seasons, each time looking again outside my normal environment for a new sense
of presence of the Lord. I always felt committed to our ministry there but
researched several Charismatic as well as other mainline churches, whose
philosophy of ministry was compatible with ours. I received a great deal of
satisfaction in what we were doing as a church and enjoyed great self esteem in
being central to our activities. Again, as in my earlier years, I had
established a sense of "super pride" in my expression of the "true meaning of
the church". It was great to be in a church that, though not unique, was a
rarity in both Denver and certainly the Presbyterian Church. I could not imagine
any circumstances that would ever cause me to leave Corona Church.
As I look back, I do not marginalize either my sincerity in following the Lord,
my spirituality, or personal piety at this point in my life. I believe I lived
out every spiritual truth that I had embraced up to that point. I certainly was
considered approachable by those around me. I was looked up to by many. There, I
led a wonderful choral experience for many years that was a major incorporating
vehicle for the church and co-pastored a growing singles' ministry that touched
hundreds of lives. I now believe that I see more about what God was doing in my
life there, than I was able to at that time. While I was at Corona Presbyterian,
I read a great many books about worship. Of major influence upon me were Worship is a
Verb and Evangelicals on the Canterbury Trail both by Robert E. Webber and
Evangelical is Not Enough by Thomas Howard. I initiated with Bob Webber, when he
taught a class on worship in Denver at St. John's Cathedral and thereafter
continued to maintain contact with him exchanging many ideas and experiences
about worship. Other writers such as John and Charles Wesley, and Henri Nouwen played a
great role in my spiritual process. I discovered a passion to worship and to equip
others for worship ministry that up to that time had not been clear to me.
My sense of call from the Lord
Early in 1986 I believed that the Lord was leading me to pursue a more active
worship ministry in the church specifically employing my gifts in music with
choral work and organ performance. Since there was no such position available at
our church, I sought a position elsewhere. The Lord had much more in store for
me than I could have ever imagined, as I moved away from Corona. Things did not emerge as I had anticipated. In
June I was appointed the minister of worship, music, and organist at Meadow Hills
Baptist Church, Aurora CO. Meadow Hills is a small North American Baptist
congregation. I now believe that leaving Corona was a significant positive
turning point in my spiritual development. The environment at Meadow Hills did
not have the narrowness in theology or lifestyle that had always been a part of
my life. It was not as comfortable as being where all those around me were more
spiritually homogeneous. Rev. Roger Cauthon held up as high values the values of personal
responsibility and individual personal spiritual development .
If there was a collective mind set at Meadow Hills it embraced these things
rather than everyone being and thinking alike about the Bible and spirituality.
Clearly his style of leadership was that of discovery and encouragement rather
than policing of the church and its leaders. While there, I designed all our
worship services in conjunction with him. This included the selections of hymns,
choruses, choral and organ literature, solo music, chanted psalmody, prayers, and
responsive scripture readings. Other elements we employed in worship often
included drama, audio-visual and readers’ theater. After five years there, I
desired to seek a full-time position on a church staff in the worship/music
ministry. That led to several wonderful, but often disappointing dead end
church staff interviews. Eventually my next church position was a short-term tenure back at
Corona Church as organist and director of music. My ministry there was focused
on their traditional worship service. I also introduced some historic Holy Week
services. I resigned there because I had
come to believe that the actual needs in that position were substantially
different from what was represented to me in the interview process, particularly
in style of leadership and musical style expectations. My spiritual
growth had taken me away from this very conservative environment, and I found it
very incongruent with what I had come to believe about worship and especially
how we were to live our lives without continually assessing everyone's
spirituality quotient. I had also become a sacramentalist. I believed that
worship was the people's expression of praise and adoration to God in response
to his gracious ongoing initiatives with us. Individual participation had to be
more than singing hymns. The application of "teaching them to observe" talked
about in Matthew 28 was not to observe by looking at, rather to be an integral
participant in what we are called to do - worship. It should involve physical
posture, majestic pageantry, times of silence and corporate prayers together. It
was talking to and listening to God. As the Apostle Paul teaches in 1
Corinthians 14, a consequence of worship is that the church is built up.
Authentic worship changes us more and more into the image of Christ.
After much consideration I acknowledged my strong leading of God to commit to
the expression of worship which is embodied in the traditional Episcopal Church.
We attended Ascension Episcopal Church in Denver for several years and in 1994
we joined St. Gabriel the Archangel Episcopal Church in Cherry Hills after being invited there by a
good friend, Fr. Bruce Youngquist. After completing the Catechumenate program at St. Gabriel’s, I was
confirmed by the Bishop. During most of my early time at St. Gabriel's, I
sang in the choir and assisted the organist/choir director from time to
time when asked.
In May 1998 I accepted an interim position of organist/choirmaster at St.
Gabriel’s to again explore the worship/music ministry. I have always seen my
call from God having never been removed, but that I was in a season where I was
called to different professional energies and family priorities. I am very
pleased that God had opened up the opportunity to return to the leadership of our
worship ministry. In October 1998 I accepted the permanent position at St.
Gabriel's. I sensed my call to encompass the following areas: planning of
corporate worship experiences with the preaching pastor and celebrant, leading
and equipping others to lead in our worship experiences. The scope of my
ministry included directing the choir and playing the organ for public worship
services. I also feel called to encourage development and create opportunity for
others to use their gifts of music. I established an choral and organ scholar
program for undergraduate musicians who had aspirations to become church
musicians. My style of encouragement and teaching has a distinctively pastoral
style.
In the fall of 2003 I was admitted to the masters degree program at the
Institute for Worship Studies, Florida Campus, Orange Park FL. In late 2004 I
resigned from my regular church position. This permitted me to devote much more time to my
graduate education as well as my family and software business. I completed my
MWS (Masters of Worship Studies) degree in June 2005 at which time I entered the
Doctoral program for Worship Studies, and graduated in 2008. The founder and
President of the school was Dr. Robert
E. Webber. This school offers a unique program providing distance learning, yet requiring
significant on significant campus classes each semester. My doctoral
dissertation focused out living our baptismal covenant, which was essentially a
design and implementation of a small-scaled Catechumenate program to help
clarify the process of how we become and establish a solid foundation as
Christian within the Christian community. The extensive
reading, writing, class discussions and interaction with others who share my
passion for authentic Christian worship has made a tremendous impact on my
theology and practice of worship leading. I have served as a guest lecturer in the area of worship at
Colorado Christian University, Denver Seminary, as well as the WYAM School
of Worship in the UK. I have authored two books:
Forgiveness: Unleashing a
Transformational Process and
The Secrets of a Successful Small
Business: What the University Will Not Teach You. I am also a professor
and thesis director at the Kaleo
Institute at Brewer Christian College. I also mentor students as a thesis
supervisor for doctoral students at the Robert E.
Webber Institute for Worship Studies. I am one of the founding members of
the Ancient-Future Faith Network.
As I entered the 21st century I found that some of my tried and true litmus
tests for spirituality were flawed. I have experienced a number of unexpected
personal challenges. My limited personal theology was insufficient to guide me
through the traumas on my path. Simplistic rules of how to live my life did not
bring about the needed resolution of pain, grief and sadness. My experiences and
relationships through The Institute for Worship Studies has played a major part
in this growth process for me. I am so glad to experience the love of God in
ordinary and even surprising places and people. I am learning that the Lord can
touch and guide us in ways that were far beyond the myopic boundary conditions
of our past experiences. For these discoveries I am daily grateful!
Education:
January 2013 - Institute for Worship Studies, Orange Park FL,
'Worship and Sacramental Spirituality, Dr. Gordon T. Smith
June 2012 - Institute for Worship Studies, Orange Park FL,
Worshiping With the Church Fathers, Dr. Christopher Hall
June 2011 - Institute for Worship Studies, Orange Park FL,
A Sacramental
Journey: Remembering Jesus Christ Risen from the Dead with Dr. Robert Stamps
June 2010 - Institute for Worship Studies, Orange Park, FL,
The Liturgy as the Epiphany of the Church, Dr. Simon Chan
June 2009 - Institute for Worship Studies, Orange Park, FL,
The Emergent Church, Phyllis Tickle
June 2008 - Institute for Worship Studies, Orange Park FL - graduated the Doctor
of Worship Studies program
Primary areas of study - Biblical Foundations and
Historical Development of Christian Worship, Sunday Worship - Music and the Arts,
The Christian Church Year, Sacred Actions and the Ministries of Worship.
June 2005 - Institute for Worship Studies, Orange Park FL - graduated the Masters of Worship
Studies program
January 2005 - History of Christian Worship, Institute for Worship Studies,
Orange Park FL
June 2004 - Church Worship and Contemporary Culture - Institute for Worship
Studies, Orange Park FL
January 2004 - Biblical Theology of Worship, Institute for Worship Studies,
Orange Park FL (admitted to the Masters of Worship Studies program)
December 1994 - The North American Summit on the Future of Christian Worship,
Nashville TN, Dr. Robert Webber
July 1989 - Westminster Choir College, Princeton NJ, Organ Improvisation – Dr.
Paul Manz
April 24, 1988 - Ordained to the Gospel Ministry by Meadow Hills Baptist Church,
Aurora, Colorado
July 1986 - Colorado State University, Ft. Collins CO- Handbell Performance -
Steve Busch
July 1983 - Westminster Choir College, Princeton NJ - Practical Procedures for
the Church Organist -Dr. Joan Lippincott
July 1980 - Westminster Choir College, Princeton NJ - Choral Conducting with
John Bailey, Yale Institute of Sacred Music - Jon Bailey
1978-1979 - Private study of choral conducting with Mr. Al Lewis, Denver Public
Schools
March 1978 - Fuller Theological Seminary, Pasadena CA - Theology and Styles of
Worship, Dr. Robert N. Shaper
1972 - Private Study of organ with Dr. Robert Cavara, Chairman of Organ
Department, Colorado State University, Ft. Collins CO
1970 - University of Oklahoma – received a Bachelor of Science in Electrical
Engineering also studied organ with graduate music faculty; Substitute organist
for numerous churches in the area and in various denominations
1953-1965 - Private lessons in piano and organ from Ms. Marcia Ehrheart, Duncan
OK
Experience:
July 2002 - spent two weeks in London composing music at Charles' Wesley's organ
at the Wesley Chapel.
October 1998 - 2004 - Organist and Director of Music Ministries, St. Gabriel the
Archangel Episcopal Church, Cherry Hills Village CO
January-August 1992 - Organist and Director of Music, Corona Presbyterian
Church, Denver CO
July 1986-1991- Worship Leader, Director of Music and Organist, Meadow Hills
Baptist Church, Aurora CO
1984 - Built and owned KHME-FM Radio station in Duncan OK
1980-present - Founded Adoration Publishing Company, Denver CO
1975 - 1983 - Director of twenty voice Baroque Choral Ensemble, developed and
co-pastored large single ministry, Corona Presbyterian Church, Denver
1974-1986 - Owner of Larry D. Ellis & Associates, P.C., Telecommunications
Consulting Engineers, Denver CO
1986 - 2012 - President and principal of SoftWright LLC (engineering software
company), Denver CO
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